on the dole

What does it mean to be ‘okay?’  Depends on whom you ask.

What does it mean to live a full life?  Half the world’s population starves, and the other half waste enough to feed the first half (so it’s been said.)

You could complain, or count your blessings.  (Or both, idk.)

As for me, it’s time to start selling my belongings in order to omnom, since I haven’t been working as of late.  I literally have a bowl of really nice organic Dole bananas as a last meal until I can sell my PS3, lol.  The organic ones stay fresher quite longer, which is cool.

Thankfully I have belongings to sell, and that I’m in the particular situation I’m in.  Without being a vet… well, if I wasn’t a vet, maybe none of this stuff would’ve happened! [Or perhaps it would’ve been rendered differently.]  Don’t know.  I’ve received a lot of help from unexpected places in my lifetime, from people I might never know.  It reminds me to (try) to be kind to everyone I know.  PTSD can really mess you up, especially if you were in the front lines [or knew people who were there.]  I knew a few.  War seems unavoidable the older you get, but… we sometimes try to preserve that which we love at any cost.

Our world morphs by our will, in both subtle and explicit form. 
Our bodies function to carry out that will.
And the origin of that will?  [What things does your heart cherish?]

Why terminate that will through suicide or violence?  (Maybe, the desire to end the vision of sorrow.)

When thoughts of this nature come to mind, I think of a saying from Bjork, ‘nature conspires to help you.’  I think of this when I’ve considered my diet as of late:  fish, wheat and leafy green vegetables like kale with varied oils & spices derived from sesame seeds, olives and the salt of the sea.  (Especially the kale, which revives my tired blood and eyes.)  Trying to literally live off the land, as fresh and nutritious as possible.  Remembering those days of cooking for myself, and hopefully cooking for others who would like that I’d have to offer, is one reason why I choose to be hopeful for the future.  There are no guarantees that it will happen, but… I do what I can. 

Other things I live for are:
Sleeping.
Family, both by blood & extended.
Music.
[REDACTED], lmao.
Video games.
Smiling faces.

Phone is messed up, so haven’t been online lately 😦  On the positive side, I’m forced to read some pretty awesome books in my personal library like ‘Cryptonomicon’ by Neal Stephenson 😀