on the dole

What does it mean to be ‘okay?’Β  Depends on whom you ask.

What does it mean to live a full life?Β  Half the world’s population starves, and the other half waste enough to feed the first half (so it’s been said.)

You could complain, or count your blessings.Β  (Or both, idk.)

As for me, it’s time to start selling my belongings in order to omnom, since I haven’t been working as of late.Β  I literally have a bowl of really nice organic Dole bananas as a last meal until I can sell my PS3, lol.Β  The organic ones stay fresher quite longer, which is cool.

Thankfully I have belongings to sell, and that I’m in the particular situation I’m in.Β  Without being a vet… well, if I wasn’t a vet, maybe none of this stuff would’ve happened! [Or perhaps it would’ve been rendered differently.]Β  Don’t know.Β  I’ve received a lot of help from unexpected places in my lifetime, from people I might never know.Β  It reminds me to (try) to be kind to everyone I know.Β  PTSD can really mess you up, especially if you were in the front lines [or knew people who were there.]Β  I knew a few.Β  War seems unavoidable the older you get, but… we sometimes try to preserve that which we love at any cost.

Our world morphs by our will, in both subtle and explicit form.Β 
Our bodies function to carry out that will.
And the origin of that will?Β  [What things does your heart cherish?]

Why terminate that will through suicide or violence?Β  (Maybe, the desire to end the vision of sorrow.)

When thoughts of this nature come to mind, I think of a saying from Bjork, ‘nature conspires to help you.’Β  I think of this when I’ve considered my diet as of late:Β  fish, wheat and leafy green vegetables like kale with varied oils & spices derived from sesame seeds, olives and the salt of the sea.Β  (Especially the kale, which revives my tired blood and eyes.)Β  Trying to literally live off the land, as fresh and nutritious as possible.Β  Remembering those days of cooking for myself, and hopefully cooking for others who would like that I’d have to offer, is one reason why I choose to be hopeful for the future.Β  There are no guarantees that it will happen, but… I do what I can.Β 

Other things I live for are:
Family, both by blood & extended.
[REDACTED], lmao.
Video games.
Smiling faces.

Phone is messed up, so haven’t been online lately 😦  On the positive side, I’m forced to read some pretty awesome books in my personal library like ‘Cryptonomicon’ by Neal Stephenson πŸ˜€


11 thoughts on “on the dole”

  1. If I could share my table with you, I would in a spilt second. Thank you for your service. It breaks my heart to hear that you’re in need right now… stay strong honey. ❀❀❀❀

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I did not want to leave a response, without leaving some resources that can get you moving, little by little out of a place of poverty. I have been there, and with a child, so I know in some ways how you are feeling in that aspect.

    If you are able to connect to the internet, Contact your local Salvation Army. If you are hungry, they will feed you😌
    Just type in your location.

    Reach out to your local “Catholic charities” organization. They will also help you with food, amongst other things.

    Call (866)888-8777
    That is the emergency food hotline for New York city. I called them just to make sure they were legit. They are. An automated system will prompt you to push specific numbers based on your needs. For emergency food…you will push 1. You will be asked a list of very helpful and necessary questions, based on your personal, household and nutritional needs. You are also asked if you want to eat at a soup kitchen, or be given bagged groceries. You are asked what specific day that you want them for.

    (Dollar General)…..if you are able to work, I believe that they pay weekly. It is great employment if you need a weekly based income.


    That above link is jam packed with information that may be of great use to you. Please take a look at it.

    If you do not mind me asking….where about in New York are you located? You can reply through a comment on one of my posts, and I will delete it immediately, if you are more comfortable.

    If you must sell something, offerup.com helps you get the job done. In fact, some make livings buying and selling on that site because it works so well.

    I know that it is hard right now, but you are going to be alright. You keep moving and working hard. You gotta pray brother. I know you have your disbeliefs, but even in your disbeliefs, God still wants to order your steps. You know I’m praying for you. Prayer does work.
    This situation that you are going through, will one day be your testimony. ☺

    Liked by 2 people

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