return of saturn

kill ’em with kindness.  silence can be golden, i’m learning.

the past few days are best described as bittersweet.

being an adult, experiencing the return of Saturn… that age of your life when your parents brought you into this strange world.  I used to be a very idealistic person.  I still am, ‘cept it’s been tempered by some experience.  Knowing when to reach out to others and when to withdraw.  To talk, and to be silent.  Noticing the patterns of the week, and of seasons.

Love even those that wish to do you harm.  That doesn’t mean to let people walk all over you, but sometimes people can be so miserable and don’t know what else to do.  Or maybe they’re under pressure by their superego, or authority figure to act a certain way.  It’s sometimes east to want to get even, but I don’t want to be the one to multiply sorrows on earth.

Life can be hella unpredictable.  Never thought I’d be living the way I do, and I am thankful for this life all the same.  Perhaps things may turn out better than anticipated; I don’t know.  All I can do is try my best.  Up to my ears in debt and relying on government programs to stay healthy, but at least I can say that me and my loved ones are relatively healthy.  And for those that aren’t, a speedy recovery (or peaceful death for the terminally ill) is my wish.

Work is on the brain, so it may be a while before I can get my creative juices flowing like before.  Been working with Ren’Py, the visual novel engine, and I’m in love with it.  Hope to publish my very own interactive story to share with everyone soon. 😉